vexant | ( penance ) inbox

[ he plunks down on the floor, stretching out and rubbing his eyes. he's gonna need a nap to end all naps. ]

I make a lot of trouble for you too. Eventually you're gonna catch on that we're not doing equal work here and trade up.

( if josh falls asleep on the floor julian's going to wake him up by throwing him in the shower. again. )

I'm the leader. You're doing your job: following orders. There's nothing else expected of you.

[ mmmmmmm that's a risk he's willing to take. he's not moving.

he is, however, laughing. his arm folds over his face. ]

What are you, Cyclops?

Better than that old weasel.

( fingers of his left hand curling into a fist, before he's raising it up to his forehead and dropping it back down. just testing it. )

I'm Hellion.

( he sounds pleased, at least. )

You sure are.

[ and now we're in hell.

he mulls over the next words in his mind for a moment. ]

Who'd you start bullying when I skipped town?

Do you think I just find the closest push-over and bully them?

( maybe. maybe he does. )

I mean you know what they say about bullying someone.

[ god he's so tired. ]

It means you liiiiike them.

You know that's nowhere close to why I started on you.

( just. going to kick at josh's side, a little. since he's on the ground and all. )

[ why are you like this ]

'Started' is the key word there.

I liked you first.

( you know, as bros. until josh ruined it. )

Bold confession.

[ he's gonna get kicked for that, he tries to anticipate it. ]

I liked you too.

( yep. toes digging right in under josh's ribcage. )

Get up.

( first. second-- )

I know.

[ god, OW. he squirms and sits up, looking suitably tired and swats at julian's foot. ]

But everybody liked you.

[ 'liked' is a mild word. 'liked' doesn't really cover trying to copy his whole style, or compulsively showing off, or sneaking out of bed to go on reckless midnight adventures chasing ideas of heroism. he half-wonders if things hadn't blown up, if his past hadn't gotten out, if he'd have clung to julian the way he'd clung to rahne. stumbled through some awkward phase of hating himself for liking a dude, before maybe getting over it when all their friends started dying. the thought is both sobering and embarrassing.

not everybody liked julian. the one he let into his inner circle did. the rest - they respected him enough to listen. ]

People respected me.

( fine, fine. one of those nice metal hands reaches down to haul josh up to try and shove him towards the bed. if he's going to pass out, at least do it on bed. )

They respected me because they knew I knew what I was doing. Because I wasn't a mess who couldn't tell right from left half the time. Because I showed my team respect, and earned their trust right because of it.

It's part of being a leader.

[ alright alright, he's up. he'll flop onto the bed, blinking one blank eye over at julian.

he's not leadership material. he's not even good second in command material. they both know it. julian wouldn't be obligated to babysit him if it wasn't. ]

Yeah, I know. You could stand to learn to be a little nicer though.

( no, josh isn't leadership material. or right hand man material. he's--a good lackey, when he likes someone well enough. knows how to follow orders, not how to give them. which is fine for julian. he already had a second in command, he doesn't need another one. )

Being nice never got anyone anything.

[ he's not wrong. he just looks at Julian for a moment, brows ticking down. ]

People being nice makes the world less hard to live in.

Yeah? How'd that work out for you?

( mr traumatized who gets taken advantage of a lot. )

[ he gestures to Julian's hands. ]

I got to do that for you.

Aside from with me.

( josh is his lackey now, of course he's nice to julian. that's part of the deal. his hands still remain--still, by his side. unmoving. )

It stopped me from going to the dark side, Julian. Being being nice - remembering that people can be good.

You can be good without being nice.

Yeah, well... Being nice goes a lot further than being good.

I guess if I'd been nice instead of good maybe my hands wouldn't've gotten blown off.

( he just woke up but fine, whatever. he'll roll back into bed. )

[ ... staring up at the ceiling for a second. ]

If the X-Men'd been better to me, I would've been there to put them back on.

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vexant - 2020-08-14 18:01 (UTC) - Expand

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goldtoxicity - 2020-08-14 18:03 (UTC) - Expand